Tuesday, December 23, 2008

She's Never Gonna Come, Never, Never, Never!


When my brother was little, my mother found him on the potty one day with his face in his hands shaking his sad little head and saying, "She's never gonna come wipe my hiney. Never, never, never." (Do I have the story right mom?)

This is one of those stories that still comes up sometimes at family get-togethers. Not as popular as my Trying to Be Like Jesus Phase, or Christi's Kicking Down My Bedroom Door Incident but it does come up.

Well, today I can honestly say that I now know how my brother felt that day.

Don't you hate it when you realize you are out of toilet paper AFTER it's too late to go get it yourself?

This morning I found myself sitting on the potty next to an empty roll of toilet paper. Just so this story doesn't majorly gross you out, I will add here that I had only gone #1. Still, I am not one of those people who can just say "Oh, well" and pull up their pants and go. I must be clean.

No problem. I call to my children to come to my aid. Hmmm. No sound of running foot steps. I call again. Joshua comes and I show him how to take the roll off of the toilet paper holder and send him to get the roll from the other bathroom. Off he goes. I can hear him through the wall trying and trying to get the roll. No luck. He comes back saying he can't do it.

No big deal. I tell him to go tell Jack that I need his help. Joshua runs off to his bedroom where Jack and Abby are playing. Minutes go by. I hear the sounds of Joshua playing with toys. He's apparently forgotten all about me.

I try to call again. No luck. I wait a few more minutes because my children are usually coming to find me every 2-3 minutes anyway. (I know that I'm not the only mom that can't even find peace in the bathroom!) About 2 minutes later and still no luck.

They're never gonna come. Never, never, never.

What am I going to do? I look around the bathroom. There has to be something. The shower? Hmmm. Well, I haven't had one of those yet today so now is as good a time as any. When I get in, who comes knocking at my door? Jack!

5 comments:

Katrina said...

Hilarious!

Sarah said...

What a predicament!

Tori said...

How funny... and SO likely... no one when you need 'em, all there when ya don't! ;)

Kristin said...

I have been there too. How is it I am the only one in my family that has that problem?

Mike and Desiree and the Boys said...

This is awesome. And also why it is great that I have a toilet paper esp. I know when it is all out. I don't know if there is a superhero way I could use this. Maybe if I were to put toilet paper in bank vaults and then know when it had been robbed? Anyway, good luck in the future!